Sometimes life is just ridiculous. Sunday night was one of those moments where you just stop and ask “Is this really happening?” As I continue to play, and hopefully soon live in the city, I’m realizing the only answer to that question is, “Only in Atlanta.”
Here’s the scene: At a friend’s high rise apartment in Midtown late Sunday night. We’ve just finished church and our usual Dinner/wine/Disney movie get-together that we do every Sunday. (Which is amazing by the way, however, the boys demand its getting too girly so next week is Gladiator and wine. Fine by me) I digress…so, I head out pretty late and walk to where my car is parked in the small parking lot in front of the high rise. There are literally only 8 spaces. I notice another car is parked next to mine but their lights are on and one of the doors is open. Hmm, slightly sketchy. Their driver’s side door is open and right next to my driver’s side hence causing a problem with me getting in my car. I come around the car and smile at the driver to show that he is going to need to close his door for me to get in my car. This is when I hear what sounds like water hitting the pavement….my first reaction is “OH GROSS! Someone is throwing up out of the car. This is uncomfortable.” The driver casts me an awkward apologetic face and then I notice why. From behind the door I can see someone’s head peeping over the top of the door and notice she is squatting. Oh yes…its going there. As soon as I notice this girl squatting I realize that the noise I hear is from her peeing behind the door on the concrete!!!
I immediately get really awkward and quickly walk away from the car “Sorry, sorry I didn’t see you. I just need to get to my car.” At the same time I’m wondering WHY AM I APOLOGIZING TO THE GIRL PEEING BY MY CAR!! Peeing is usually a private thing and I had felt like I had invaded hers. However, SHE WAS PEEING IN MIDTOWN, IN A PARKING LOT, BY MY CAR! (May I make note that she was 1.wearing a dress [at least she’s classy] and she was 2. peeing by the driver’s door and 3.the driver was there! [Either her boyfriend, babies daddy, husband…you pick]). So, she awkwardly got up and ran back around to the passenger side when she had finished. Which, also weird…you would think when someone catches you doing that you immediately stop and get back in the car. Oh no, she continued to relieve herself after I caught her.
So, I’m thinking, that’s just awesome. I can see the giant puddle right by my door. There was a very good chance I would step in it. If I tried to get in my car that way I would probably make eye contact with the public urinator and then they would watch me try to scamper around her urine. That’s really uncomfortable. I opted for climbing into my seat via the passenger door.
When I pulled out of the parking lot I made sure to give her a dirty look because I’m pretty sure my tires ran over her urine. I don’t even want to talk about how much that just grosses me out. Sigh. Only in Atlanta.
