Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Dear Sir

Dear Sir in tight, small, yellow sophie shorts,
I respect your self expression via your work-out out fit. However, it makes me uncomfortable that your shorts are so vibrant, and also shorter than my own. When paired with your black tank top, I will agree you would make most Tech fans very happy and you slightly remind me of a chubby bumble bee. However, us being in a class like Body Pump where there is movement and stretching involved, your outfit tends to make me slightly nervous. Also, yellow shows sweat stains debatably worse than grey....

I fear that if there was an "incident" it would be something I would possibly need therapy for later; therapy I can't afford at the moment.

I also fear, that your shorts will be something I would have to tell my future husband about as a part of my "past".

I fear that you would show up to Yoga in this outfit, and in that case, I could run crying from the room.

I fear that the other men in our class will think "What a great idea! Sophie Shorts!" and that trend will catch on and then I will have to Body Pump with a blind fold on. Perhaps it would be yellow so that I would match everyone else.

These are my thoughts. Know that I write this letter in utter and complete respect....and also fear, as stated above. Please take my concerns into consideration the next time you select your Body Pump shorts.

Monday Night Body Pump Class Attendee