Well a good thing can't last too long. I was feeling pretty good about myself because of my award. Told the mom that I had my award hanging up in my office...very proud.
She replied, "You mean storage room."
Shot down.
Low blow mom. Low blow.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Fridge Worthy
Today has probably been my favorite morning ever!
"Why?" you may ask...especially when mornings usually carry with them some of the lowest points of the day: waking up, getting up, moving, showering, traffic and the most infamous....going to work.
However, upon my arrival to work I found a present!
That's right...a present....left in my chair.
Someone snuck into my storage room (ha someone remembered I worked in here) and left me a gift! My present was sitting upon a piece of paper...my curiosity was up.
The paper ended up being an Award!! Oh my day just got 10 times better. Only thing better than a gift is an award!
I was pumped...what could this award be for?? I pick it up and this is what it read.
Wait. To preface my award...remember that I just returned from spending a week in a Warehouse moving Christmas crap. We joked the whole week that work gloves could give you super powers. Our boss would put those bad boys on and there was no stopping her. We'd look over and she would be lifting things three time her size...hauling crates with Floyd in tow. She also was the hardest business woman ever when the gloves were on. When we were pricing things she didn't really get the idea of a "garage sale" and was more concerned with making money off of the junk.
" Denise....$5 dollars for this snowman right?"
" No...are you crazy! $30. Not a penny less!"
"But...his arms are broken and he doesn't have any eyes."
"I don't care. $30 dollars!"
Hence our fear when Boss would "put on her gloves". It was about the same concept as a superhero putting on their cape or mask....there was no stopping someone with the gloves on. Overpriced junk and heavy lifting usually followed in their path of destruction.
So...my award read:
For your amazig ability to withstand the heat, lift heavy objects, work on a weeked, endure Floyd's extreme body odor, and "put on the gloves," I hereby award you the well deserved Work Glove Award.
(paper decorated with work gloves.)
I laughed out loud. My Boss was funny. I don't want to work somewhere where no one gives out awards.
Despite what the award was for...which is quirky office appreciation...I felt really proud of myself. I had a flash back of school Awards Day and the anticipation and joy of winning awards like "The Bible Award"..."Star Student"....."Perfect Attendance" (HA who are we kidding I NEVER got that one!) etc.
I called my mom and let her know her baby girl was making it in the real world...I had even gotten an award for doing so well. She laughed and then in all seriousness she said, "we should frame it."
Again flash back to middle school when your parents put the "Most Improved" Award up on the fridge and make a big deal because you got an award. However, it might as well be called "You really sucked in the beginning, but your decent now" award.
The parent trick worked though....this is definately making an appearance on the fridge.
"Why?" you may ask...especially when mornings usually carry with them some of the lowest points of the day: waking up, getting up, moving, showering, traffic and the most infamous....going to work.
However, upon my arrival to work I found a present!
That's right...a present....left in my chair.
Someone snuck into my storage room (ha someone remembered I worked in here) and left me a gift! My present was sitting upon a piece of paper...my curiosity was up.
The paper ended up being an Award!! Oh my day just got 10 times better. Only thing better than a gift is an award!
I was pumped...what could this award be for?? I pick it up and this is what it read.
Wait. To preface my award...remember that I just returned from spending a week in a Warehouse moving Christmas crap. We joked the whole week that work gloves could give you super powers. Our boss would put those bad boys on and there was no stopping her. We'd look over and she would be lifting things three time her size...hauling crates with Floyd in tow. She also was the hardest business woman ever when the gloves were on. When we were pricing things she didn't really get the idea of a "garage sale" and was more concerned with making money off of the junk.
" Denise....$5 dollars for this snowman right?"
" No...are you crazy! $30. Not a penny less!"
"But...his arms are broken and he doesn't have any eyes."
"I don't care. $30 dollars!"
Hence our fear when Boss would "put on her gloves". It was about the same concept as a superhero putting on their cape or mask....there was no stopping someone with the gloves on. Overpriced junk and heavy lifting usually followed in their path of destruction.
So...my award read:
For your amazig ability to withstand the heat, lift heavy objects, work on a weeked, endure Floyd's extreme body odor, and "put on the gloves," I hereby award you the well deserved Work Glove Award.
(paper decorated with work gloves.)
I laughed out loud. My Boss was funny. I don't want to work somewhere where no one gives out awards.
Despite what the award was for...which is quirky office appreciation...I felt really proud of myself. I had a flash back of school Awards Day and the anticipation and joy of winning awards like "The Bible Award"..."Star Student"....."Perfect Attendance" (HA who are we kidding I NEVER got that one!) etc.
I called my mom and let her know her baby girl was making it in the real world...I had even gotten an award for doing so well. She laughed and then in all seriousness she said, "we should frame it."
Again flash back to middle school when your parents put the "Most Improved" Award up on the fridge and make a big deal because you got an award. However, it might as well be called "You really sucked in the beginning, but your decent now" award.
The parent trick worked though....this is definately making an appearance on the fridge.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Because she's Fuzzy
This week my department had to leave the city and go into an undisclosed city South of Atlanta. Now making the statement "South of Atlanta" should fill most of you in on the kind of town we were in without me even stating the name. Another synonym could be Po-Dunk Ville. OK ...that's not true..they did have a Panera.
I was impressed.
Anyway...my job for the week was to clean out an old warehouse where we had been storing things for probably the past 10 years or so. Mainly Christmas stuff. Mainly really old tacky Christmas crap. We spent two days organizing it and then we were going to have a HUGE glorified 'garage sale' in Po-Dunk Ville. I doubted the success of this plan..honestly. However, I failed to realize that in before mentioned 'Po Dunk' the only thing to do on the weekends is drive around looking for 'garage sales.'
Day one I really realized what kind of town this was. My boss and I were meeting another co worker at the warehouse to help sort through stuff, however she beat us down there. We finally get to "Po dunk" and upon driving through I realize that our warehouse is in the armpit of Georgia. We drive down some old country roads.. not like the cute ones in Athens...more like the ones you see in those horror flicks where the whole town gets wiped out by a serial killer. We pull up to the sorriest excuse for a building..complete with over grown weeds..broken down cars...and a cliche country lady smoking a cig out front on her smoking break. Immediately my heart drops. I have to spend all week here! And then I remember co worker has been here for a couple hours by herself! Ugh..i felt bad. We walk in the very dimly lit crate filled warehouse and see coworker plugging away hard at work. Following her around are these two old men who I suppose either own it or are suppose to be helping. Immediately I assess the awkwardness of poor coworker having to work in such close quarters with these random men. We get closer and I get to meet Floyd. Yes...Floyd. I smiled when he introduced himself...and then immediately tried not to grimace when Floyd smiled and showed a full set of gums. Oh Po Dunk ville...the land of no teeth.
Floyd is now my favorite person because he absolutely embodies the mental image of country bumpkin for me.
White T-shirt..probably worn the past 3 days. At least it smelled like it.
Blue jeans...well worn.
Skinny as a rail. Or according to Floyd, "only 3 lbs more than I weighed when I was seventeen."
No teeth
Very wrinkly- looks like he is about 80.
Smokes like a chimney (I counted...packed his pipe 4-5 times in less than an hour.)
Hardest worker I've ever seen.
A good adjective would be gritty.
I also noticed another creature. A dog. Not just any dog...part dog probably part wolf. She was very shaggy...had a brindle coat,jet black head, and wolf tale. Floyd patted her on the head, pulled his pipe out of his mouth and said..."we call her Fuzz."
Now I took linguistics this year...most ridiculous class ever..but I did learn valuable information...information that I had not put to good use until this moment. In order to make the "f" sound...one must use put their lips against their teeth and blow. When one doesn't have teeth this sound becomes very hard to make. So I awkwardly couldn't tell if he was saying Fuzz or Buzz.
"Oh her name is Buzz," I stated.
"No...Fuzz. (still sounding like Buzz) Because she's Fuzzy," he replied.
I smiled.
The simplicity of the name and stereotypical people and scenery made me.
From this moment I knew...this week was going to be funny.
I was impressed.
Anyway...my job for the week was to clean out an old warehouse where we had been storing things for probably the past 10 years or so. Mainly Christmas stuff. Mainly really old tacky Christmas crap. We spent two days organizing it and then we were going to have a HUGE glorified 'garage sale' in Po-Dunk Ville. I doubted the success of this plan..honestly. However, I failed to realize that in before mentioned 'Po Dunk' the only thing to do on the weekends is drive around looking for 'garage sales.'
Day one I really realized what kind of town this was. My boss and I were meeting another co worker at the warehouse to help sort through stuff, however she beat us down there. We finally get to "Po dunk" and upon driving through I realize that our warehouse is in the armpit of Georgia. We drive down some old country roads.. not like the cute ones in Athens...more like the ones you see in those horror flicks where the whole town gets wiped out by a serial killer. We pull up to the sorriest excuse for a building..complete with over grown weeds..broken down cars...and a cliche country lady smoking a cig out front on her smoking break. Immediately my heart drops. I have to spend all week here! And then I remember co worker has been here for a couple hours by herself! Ugh..i felt bad. We walk in the very dimly lit crate filled warehouse and see coworker plugging away hard at work. Following her around are these two old men who I suppose either own it or are suppose to be helping. Immediately I assess the awkwardness of poor coworker having to work in such close quarters with these random men. We get closer and I get to meet Floyd. Yes...Floyd. I smiled when he introduced himself...and then immediately tried not to grimace when Floyd smiled and showed a full set of gums. Oh Po Dunk ville...the land of no teeth.
Floyd is now my favorite person because he absolutely embodies the mental image of country bumpkin for me.
White T-shirt..probably worn the past 3 days. At least it smelled like it.
Blue jeans...well worn.
Skinny as a rail. Or according to Floyd, "only 3 lbs more than I weighed when I was seventeen."
No teeth
Very wrinkly- looks like he is about 80.
Smokes like a chimney (I counted...packed his pipe 4-5 times in less than an hour.)
Hardest worker I've ever seen.
A good adjective would be gritty.
I also noticed another creature. A dog. Not just any dog...part dog probably part wolf. She was very shaggy...had a brindle coat,jet black head, and wolf tale. Floyd patted her on the head, pulled his pipe out of his mouth and said..."we call her Fuzz."
Now I took linguistics this year...most ridiculous class ever..but I did learn valuable information...information that I had not put to good use until this moment. In order to make the "f" sound...one must use put their lips against their teeth and blow. When one doesn't have teeth this sound becomes very hard to make. So I awkwardly couldn't tell if he was saying Fuzz or Buzz.
"Oh her name is Buzz," I stated.
"No...Fuzz. (still sounding like Buzz) Because she's Fuzzy," he replied.
I smiled.
The simplicity of the name and stereotypical people and scenery made me.
From this moment I knew...this week was going to be funny.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
The Heads
So the storage room today is just giving me the willies. (again another word you use when your aging. I'm going to throw those in there every now and again to see if your paying attention) I walk in this morning and there are our giant mascot outfits sitting on the table by my desk. (our company has mascots...don't ask) Anyway...any kind of mascot is creepy...ESPECIALLY when there isn't a person in it. You would never want to see Mickey Mouse without a person in it...it be like a dead Mickey. In our case its like a decapitated "Bob" and "Mary". (Bob and Mary will be what we call our boy and girl mascots.)
They had been chilling in the hall near their appropriate cubicles waiting to be fixed. Still creepy but not near my desk so it didn't bother me. However, it came to the attention of those in charge of Bob and Mary that letting them lye around in the open wasn't a good idea either. This occurred to them when there was child in the office the other day and they found her poking Bob's lifeless decapitated head. I laugh at this mental picture because it makes me think of what kids do when they find dead things...maybe if I poke it some more it will wake back up. So they decided that lifeless Bob and Mary may upset the kids....so now they are my new storage room buddies. I'm contemplating setting them up so I can pretend I have someone to talk to. Well...that actually may be creepier. In the mean time their creepy over sized blue (yup their blue) foam heads are staring at me.
And to tip over the creepy scale I found an abnormally large spider by my desk. However, he evaded me when I tried to kill him with some of my storage room supply. Eek.
So me and the Heads and the spider have had a good day.
That spider better be dead by tomorrow!
They had been chilling in the hall near their appropriate cubicles waiting to be fixed. Still creepy but not near my desk so it didn't bother me. However, it came to the attention of those in charge of Bob and Mary that letting them lye around in the open wasn't a good idea either. This occurred to them when there was child in the office the other day and they found her poking Bob's lifeless decapitated head. I laugh at this mental picture because it makes me think of what kids do when they find dead things...maybe if I poke it some more it will wake back up. So they decided that lifeless Bob and Mary may upset the kids....so now they are my new storage room buddies. I'm contemplating setting them up so I can pretend I have someone to talk to. Well...that actually may be creepier. In the mean time their creepy over sized blue (yup their blue) foam heads are staring at me.
And to tip over the creepy scale I found an abnormally large spider by my desk. However, he evaded me when I tried to kill him with some of my storage room supply. Eek.
So me and the Heads and the spider have had a good day.
That spider better be dead by tomorrow!
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Brothers
I live at home with my three brothers. Well two brothers now, the oldest just went back to college. They are amazing and so much fun to be with! They are also one of the many reasons my life is so interesting. Over the past couple weeks I've been at home I have had some pretty hilarious converstations with them. Well, they didn't see the humor in them...but I did.
Here are just some snippets of conversations with the 20 year old Junior in college and the 16 Junior in highschool. I believe my favorite quotes will shed some light on who I live with at home.
(Talking over dinner about how my College age brother wants to hitch hike across the States some day.)
"Harrison, that's not a really safe thing to do." -me
"Umm its not like I'm going to be on the side of the road sticking my thumb out....(at this point I'm relieved that he is not that stupid)....I'm going to have a big back pack on with a sign."- harrison
(stated as if they other idea was the crazy one..I return to worrying)
"Yeah but what if some crazy person picks you up. You can't trust people these days. Its just not safe to get in the car with someone." -me
"Ok..but what would they want from me. I'm a 20 year old college kid. I'm backpacking..I don't have anything of value."- harrison
"It doesn't matter they could hurt you just for the sake of hurting you. Plus they could take your money."-me
"Why would I travel with money?!"-Harrison (again stated like I am stupid)
"Why wouldn't you have money?!" -me
"Well its not safe to travel by hitchhiking with a ton of money."-harrison
"What are you going to do when you get where your going without any money?"- me
(avoidance of question)
"Cam, people do it all the time! John hitched a ride after a Braves game all the way to Kansas with a family. I'm not going to get in a car with some sketchy guy."-harry
"Yeah, but you just never know. What if they end up being dangerous."-me
(said very matter-of-factly)"If he pulls a gun on me I'll just get out of the car at a red light. It's not like he is going to shoot me around people."- Harrison
(SERIOUSLY!)
"Oh yes that always works. If only people did that when they got mugged or kidnapped...just get out of the car."- me
(discussion ended here due to the fact that it was just getting RIDICULOUS!)
Conversation with 16 yr old about the girl he likes...this week.
"So did you kiss her last night?" (granted I've only heard of and seen this girl once.)
"Well sorta"- mitchell
"Sorta? Theres no such thing as "sort of". It's yes..or no. Did your lips touch hers?"- me
"Ok yes. But it was just a peck."-mitchell
"So does she love Jesus?"- me
"Um I don't know her that well Cam."- mitchell
(ahh highschool and all its skanky glory.)
Here are just some snippets of conversations with the 20 year old Junior in college and the 16 Junior in highschool. I believe my favorite quotes will shed some light on who I live with at home.
(Talking over dinner about how my College age brother wants to hitch hike across the States some day.)
"Harrison, that's not a really safe thing to do." -me
"Umm its not like I'm going to be on the side of the road sticking my thumb out....(at this point I'm relieved that he is not that stupid)....I'm going to have a big back pack on with a sign."- harrison
(stated as if they other idea was the crazy one..I return to worrying)
"Yeah but what if some crazy person picks you up. You can't trust people these days. Its just not safe to get in the car with someone." -me
"Ok..but what would they want from me. I'm a 20 year old college kid. I'm backpacking..I don't have anything of value."- harrison
"It doesn't matter they could hurt you just for the sake of hurting you. Plus they could take your money."-me
"Why would I travel with money?!"-Harrison (again stated like I am stupid)
"Why wouldn't you have money?!" -me
"Well its not safe to travel by hitchhiking with a ton of money."-harrison
"What are you going to do when you get where your going without any money?"- me
(avoidance of question)
"Cam, people do it all the time! John hitched a ride after a Braves game all the way to Kansas with a family. I'm not going to get in a car with some sketchy guy."-harry
"Yeah, but you just never know. What if they end up being dangerous."-me
(said very matter-of-factly)"If he pulls a gun on me I'll just get out of the car at a red light. It's not like he is going to shoot me around people."- Harrison
(SERIOUSLY!)
"Oh yes that always works. If only people did that when they got mugged or kidnapped...just get out of the car."- me
(discussion ended here due to the fact that it was just getting RIDICULOUS!)
Conversation with 16 yr old about the girl he likes...this week.
"So did you kiss her last night?" (granted I've only heard of and seen this girl once.)
"Well sorta"- mitchell
"Sorta? Theres no such thing as "sort of". It's yes..or no. Did your lips touch hers?"- me
"Ok yes. But it was just a peck."-mitchell
"So does she love Jesus?"- me
"Um I don't know her that well Cam."- mitchell
(ahh highschool and all its skanky glory.)
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Santa has a bad back
So as a part of my job description I have to make sure Santa can make a special appearance at the event I'm helping with. I got the joyful job of calling him today and got to talk to Santa personally (Although I believe Mrs. Clause picked up the phone). Needless to say I got the biggest kick out of it!
Sadly, Santa just had back surgery. (Didn't know Santa had a bad back...must be from the Chimneys) However, he assured me that soon he would be as good as new and able to "carry his big red sack." This statement was followed by a great jolly HO HO HO and I literally laughed on the phone..."in spite of myself."
So this is a reminder that Santa may be recovering from back surgery..but he is indeed doing his yearly rounds come Christmas!
Sadly, Santa just had back surgery. (Didn't know Santa had a bad back...must be from the Chimneys) However, he assured me that soon he would be as good as new and able to "carry his big red sack." This statement was followed by a great jolly HO HO HO and I literally laughed on the phone..."in spite of myself."
So this is a reminder that Santa may be recovering from back surgery..but he is indeed doing his yearly rounds come Christmas!
Monday, August 4, 2008
Eeyore
So these past two weeks or so I have been grieving. Grieving the death of my college years. I honestly didn't think it would be that hard. I viewed going into the real world as new and exciting adventure! New turns, new expectations, getting out there on my own. Now that I'm here I just want to crawl back in bed and wake up in my loft in Mell Hall and it be Freshman year again. OK..maybe not Freshman year. Maybe just go back to Junior Year. That was a good year.
I apologize to everyone who has had to be around me and my permanent gray cloud above my head. I've been sad and not joyful; and have had a tendency to randomly blurt out "I miss college." Followed by a huge sigh.
Whelp...like most situations when your sad you have the allotted grieving time, which dependant on your circumstance, is a certain amount of time one is allowed to be sad and depressed. This gives you a legit excuse for not being yourself. However, this allotted mourning time has a cut off and after that cut off you can become annoying for still being upset. (This ONLY applies to life change situations or just "rough" times not to the loss of a loved one) If you pass your grief cut off you start to loose friends because no one wants to be around an Eeyore. That's right...the sluggish animated donkey from Winnie the Pooh that was always losing his tail. (Which I believe explains his permanent down cast face)
This thought hit me last night as I sat on my parents couch at home utterly depressed and sad with my life. I'm not a sad depressing person and honestly being that person the past two weeks has been pretty miserable.
So, I decided last night that my grief period was over.
It had been about two weeks, which I feel is just the right amount of time. One week to realize the change....and the Second week to just be generally unhappy about it. So this is Monday of week three and I am done.
I've cried a little bit (which is a lot for me) I've eaten everything that would need to be consumed when your sad (aka TONS of ice cream). And I've been lazy when given the opportunity. So now, I am done. I am going to make the best of this next stage and stop looking over my shoulder and crying wishing I was still living the college life. I graduated and moved and I am going to be OK with it.
I've learned that setting goals for each week helps me make my adjustment. Last week's goal was to not come home directly from work and fall asleep for 3 hours.
Accomplished.
This weeks goals: (I actually have three which may be over my head..but we shall see)
1. Don't complain about growing up.
2. Work out after work (makes you happier!)
3. Spend time with the Lord in the morning to start the day off right
Dad was informing me that quiet time in the morning before a big day at work is always better than doing it when you get home. I've known this to be true for years, however my earlier belief that "as much sleep as possible is best" has kept me from doing it.
So now I guess I have four: Get up earlier.
Goals...that's another thing you do when you get older.
(insert complaint I'm not allowed to make here__________________)
I apologize to everyone who has had to be around me and my permanent gray cloud above my head. I've been sad and not joyful; and have had a tendency to randomly blurt out "I miss college." Followed by a huge sigh.
Whelp...like most situations when your sad you have the allotted grieving time, which dependant on your circumstance, is a certain amount of time one is allowed to be sad and depressed. This gives you a legit excuse for not being yourself. However, this allotted mourning time has a cut off and after that cut off you can become annoying for still being upset. (This ONLY applies to life change situations or just "rough" times not to the loss of a loved one) If you pass your grief cut off you start to loose friends because no one wants to be around an Eeyore. That's right...the sluggish animated donkey from Winnie the Pooh that was always losing his tail. (Which I believe explains his permanent down cast face)
This thought hit me last night as I sat on my parents couch at home utterly depressed and sad with my life. I'm not a sad depressing person and honestly being that person the past two weeks has been pretty miserable.
So, I decided last night that my grief period was over.
It had been about two weeks, which I feel is just the right amount of time. One week to realize the change....and the Second week to just be generally unhappy about it. So this is Monday of week three and I am done.
I've cried a little bit (which is a lot for me) I've eaten everything that would need to be consumed when your sad (aka TONS of ice cream). And I've been lazy when given the opportunity. So now, I am done. I am going to make the best of this next stage and stop looking over my shoulder and crying wishing I was still living the college life. I graduated and moved and I am going to be OK with it.
I've learned that setting goals for each week helps me make my adjustment. Last week's goal was to not come home directly from work and fall asleep for 3 hours.
Accomplished.
This weeks goals: (I actually have three which may be over my head..but we shall see)
1. Don't complain about growing up.
2. Work out after work (makes you happier!)
3. Spend time with the Lord in the morning to start the day off right
Dad was informing me that quiet time in the morning before a big day at work is always better than doing it when you get home. I've known this to be true for years, however my earlier belief that "as much sleep as possible is best" has kept me from doing it.
So now I guess I have four: Get up earlier.
Goals...that's another thing you do when you get older.
(insert complaint I'm not allowed to make here__________________)
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