Tuesday, May 1, 2012

How To Win the Parents Over

Boyfriend's parents.

Also known as "people that have not had to put up with you your whole life" or "people who may be very frightened once they get to know you."
 I get nervous when I meet important people that I really NEED to like me.  In my old world, I'm a fairly confident individual. My family has resided that they can't fix me and have somehow become use to my weird ways. I've had friends for over 20 years (my dad says he pays them), and they find my quirks endearing and they honestly don't know any different. 

Hence why spending time with  significant other's family scares the mess out of me. Endearing may not be the adjective they use.

I tend to say exactly what I'm thinking, no matter how brazen, offensive, quirky or just flat out inappropriate. My family and close friends think it's just so "Cam". Other people...not so much. 

I've tried to remind myself about volume control just in case what is about to come out of my mouth may not be well received. Only problem is I'm a terrible whisperer. Think God also left that out of my surplus of amazing talents ...along with grace, and a mental filter.

I was spending some quality time with Jordan's family a while back. Dinner had been great. I was clever, gracious, funny, but not innapropriate. Successfully got all my food in my mouth. Nope, wait. I didn't eat. Oh, except for the last minute asparagus I ordered. I'm sure the waitor accidentally dropped that on the ground when I ordered it right after she brought the check. Fail.
Don't worry, I ate it with my hands too. (SERIOUSLY...what's wrong with me!?)

Anyway, we were leaving the restaurant, casually walking along the promenade enjoying the delightful evening until it was interrupted by a shrill screaming. The kind that literally makes the hair on your neck stand on end. I think my hands creeped up to my ears and I made an awful face at Jordan.

I look over and there is a little girl just standing on a park bench screaming at the top of her lungs.

The poor parents passed and were all like "Haha, sometimes she just does that."

And I was all like...ummmmm are you kidding me!?

But instead I smiled and gave them the "Oh Kids" face (complete with slight chuckle and wink), however, I immediately turned to Jordan and whispered "I think my uterus just shrivelled up and DIED!"

Only, again, I don't whisper, and apparently his Dad has supersonic hearing, because much to my utter embarrassment I hear his Dad burst out laughing.

ARGH! Pretty sure you never want you're boyfriends parents to hear you say the word uterus at all, let alone with the word shrivel in the same sentence.

 Inwardly I wished could be anywhere but there, and Jordan was giving me that "Later I'm going to kill you face," masked by a slight smile.

That comment was what most parents want to hear out of the girl their son is dating. Promising right?

And just when I think it can't get worse Jordan's Dad rings out " SHARI you have to hear what Cam just said!! We need a quote board for this girl!"

I told him there were already too many of those in the world.

**This blog in no way depicts my feelings towards children, or having children one day. Just my feelings towards that one child in that one moment. Someone remind me of this when I have my own kids ;)** 

1 comment:

Natalie said...

Just read this Cam - HILARIOUS! That is, as you put it, "so Cam." Love you!